How to Keep a Resolution
It's that time of year again where we start to think about the New Year and all the changes we’re going to make (and keep) in January. Usually this involves one of the following: losing weight, working out more, quitting smoking, drinking less, getting organized and some form of self improvement (read more, learn something new etc). You know the drill, we go out of the gates strong and fizzle out as we head toward February.
Why does this happen? Most people answer that question by assuming they lack willpower. I’d like to offer up some different possibilities. First, we have to want to do it. I mean really want to do it. Ambivalence has no place here. For instance, say our goal is to work out more because “we should” or “it’s good for us”. Nothing in those reasons is particularly inspiring. I can’t picture myself wanting to leave a warm bed in the morning to go outside for a walk just because I should. Can you?
Second, our goals aren’t realistic. If we can’t find time to take a 10 minute walk a day now, how’re we going to find 40 minutes/5 days a week to go to the gym? We aren’t going to suddenly become fundamentally different people just because the calendar switches over to January. This isn’t to say that we aren’t capable of becoming the person who works out daily, but the key here is that it’s a journey. Goals should start smaller. By consistently meeting smaller objectives we gain credibility with ourselves. It motivates us to continue.
Which brings me to the next issue, most of us don’t put a plan in place for “failure”. I put failure in quotes because it’s subjective. If my goal is to walk 4 mornings a week for 10 minutes and I complete 3 out of the 4 mornings is this failure? If I call it failure will that create in me the desire to want to continue? More likely than not I’ll become frustrated with myself and give up entirely.
Instead, make a plan for these situations. Before you even begin whatever it is you’ve resolved to do, record any pitfalls you foresee being a problem. Once you’ve done this write down what you’ll do to overcome the issues on the list. Keep in mind that life happens and we aren’t able to foresee the future. We won’t know every obstacle to plan for. That’s okay. Whatever you encounter, add it to the list and come up with a plan for what to do next time. If the situation is rare, shrug it off. The goal shouldn’t be executing the plan perfectly but doing it consistently.
To recap, when you make your resolutions this year, think about why you’re doing it, make your goals realistic and put a plan in place to know how you’ll respond when there are bumps in the road. Lastly, if you’d like help with any of this consider scheduling a coaching session. Sometimes it’s easier to meet our goals when we have an accountability partner, cheerleader and guide for our journey.